Several people have recently asked me to include the text of a message I recently preached in my blog. This week I have become aware of several situations where I think this will apply. I hope that God uses this to encourage you.
Ephesians 5:15-17 says:
Ephesians 5:15-17 says:
Therefore be careful how you walk, not as unwise men but as wise, making the most of your time, because the days are evil. So then do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is.
In today’s typical household, somebody always needs 5 bucks and a ride somewhere. We constantly have meetings and doctor’s appointments, or other places we need to be. We struggle to leave work in time to pick up our kids from school and drop them off at baseball practice. At the end of the day we rush home and prepare something to eat, wash dishes, take a shower, and then we get ready to do it all over again tomorrow. On weekends there’s always a car or a leaky faucet that needs work. We’re late for work and church and we regularly miss other deadlines. We work longer and harder to bring home a paycheck that barely meet our needs. A recent study found that 20 years ago, the average work week was 43 hours. Now it is 47.
As Christians, we also understand the importance of serving in ministry, spending time in Bible Study, and in fellowship with each other.
And for the next 6 months we mow grass…except for me. So far all I’ve done is work on the lawn mower. I’ve always said that there is no greater risk to my testimony than a lawn mower. As a precaution, I usually take off one of my socks and put it in my mouth when I’m working on a lawn mower.
In an attempt to balance our busy schedules we are opting for quick meals, fast food, instant rice, energy drinks, and trying to get by with less than what can be considered as a good night’s sleep. There are some days when I feel like a cup of coffee is the only thing keeping me going.
Single people are even trying something called speed dating in an effort to meet that special someone without investing a lot of time. The basic idea is that instead of going out on a date with one person at a time to look for love, groups of singles are gathering at the same place where they register and then pair up and have a conversation with a stranger of the opposite sex. In five or ten minutes a bell rings and then they get up and go have a 10 minute date with someone else.
I went on a speed date a few years ago. Yes, you heard me correctly. I cheated on DeDe. I'm not proud of it but before you judge me, please understand that I did not know that I was cheating on DeDe. In fact, I did not even know that I was on a speed date.
My son Jake, who is a musician, was performing at the Red Light Cafe in Atlanta. We decided to go see the show. We arrived and took a seat on a sofa located at the back of the room and waited for the show to begin. I kept hearing a bell ring but I really didn’t pay much attention to it. In a few minutes a girl, who looked to be in her late twenties, came over and sat down on the other side of me and introduced herself. She looked directly at me and said “Hi! I’m Kara…so…do you come here often?” I mumbled “NEVER”. I glanced over at DeDe and she was laughing. I looked across the room and my son, who was about to go on stage, was in hysterics. He was laughing so hard that he had tears in his eyes. In a few minutes a bell rang and the young lady stuck out her hand and said “It was nice to meet you. I sarcastically said “yeah me too” My son walked over after the show and said “Hey dad, how did your date go?” and broke into laughter again. I was kinda puzzled. Dede finally explained to me that I had been on a speed date. I had a real hard time living that one down.
There are all sorts of things we can try to help save time. If you don’t already have one, you might buy yourself a smart phone. Then while you’re sitting in the drive thru at McDonald's you can also check your email, do your banking and other important things such as updating your Facebook status, all at the same time.
There’s a popular word for that…"multitasking"… which simply means…do multiple things at the same time. As a word of caution, be careful when you multitask. You may have mastered text messaging but when you’re in morning traffic with a hot cup of coffee between your legs, singing along with the album version of ‘Free Bird”, it’s probably not the best time to multitask. Brothers and sisters, can I get an LOL out of that!
Wouldn’t life be easier if we just had more time?
But all there will ever be is 24 hours in a day. All we can really do is try to make sure we are using the time we have available in the best possible way.
There’s a popular word for that too. Have you ever heard the phrase “Time Management”?
There’s an entire industry based on Time Management software and products. By tracking appointments and schedules, you may find opportunities to eliminate some of the less important items on your schedule, and make more time for activities with a higher priority.
Some of the children at my church are already practicing this. They have discovered that they can increase their playtime if they simply eliminate baths from their daily schedule.
Considering the pace we’re trying to live at, it’s no wonder that there are Sunday’s when we would rather stay home and catch up on other things or rest instead of attending church services, let alone finding enough time to read our Bibles every day. And yet as Christians, if you ask any one of us, we would all agree that an active church life and spending time in the word of God is essential to our lives.
I bet we would also agree that putting on an air tank is essential if you are going to go scuba diving.
The point I’m trying to make is that even though we say that we know the importance of God’s word in our daily lives, we are more likely to get up everyday and live our lives deprived of God’s word than we are to go scuba diving without first strapping on an air supply. Obviously, if you go scuba diving with out air it’s not going to go very well.
We must understand that God’s has priorities for our lives that are as essential to us as the air we breathe if we expect to live the kind of life that we are promised we can live, in grace, free of conflict, and wrapped in the peace of God.
If I came over to your house, opened your garage door and began to look at your messy garage, you would probably say you have been meaning to clean the place up but have just been too busy.
What if, instead, I came to your house and asked you to go fishing? It’s likely that you haven’t cleaned your garage because it’s not really a top priority to you. Our real priorities almost always get done because we find or make the time for them.
To set real and meaningful priorities in our lives we first need to understand what our purpose is. We live in different family situations, work different Jobs, and face different challenges in our lives but our utmost purpose is the same.
We were created to Glorify God. In Isaiah 43:21 God told Jacob:
The people I formed for myself
that they may proclaim my praise.
Life is a gift from God to be used for the purpose of glorifying God.
Life can also be defined a period of time.
Therefore, I think we can conclude that time is also a gift from God.
1 Corinthians 10:31 says:
“So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God
So our TIME.. meaning our words, our thoughts, our actions, our songs and dance, our jobs, when we nourish our bodies,…whatever we do, our time is to be spent Glorifying God.
We glorify God by loving him, obeying him, trusting him, serving him, and by walking with him in all that we do.
We can best do this when we begin to let God’s priorities order our days instead of a unit of measurement…like the number of HOURS IN A DAY.
Our intent is to live life to its fullest but when our priorities are out of line with God’s priorities, we find ourselves feeling unfulfilled, frustrated, tired, and cheated out of the kind of life we’re supposed to have.
I want to talk about a few things that will help bring order to our lives when our life has overwhelmed us. Before we start we need to remember two things.
The first thing to remember is that we will always have enough time to do God's will. God’s plan for us will not include anything that is impossible through Him.
The second thing to remember Is that God is the author of time, therefore, the 24 hour day is not a mistake.
Time problems occur when we try to do more than, or something different than God’s Will for our lives. When we regularly find ourselves overwhelmed and unable to accomplish all that we planned to do we should take notice and view these feelings as a red flag.
1 Corinthians 14:33 says:
For God is not a God of disorder but of peace.
God’s perfect will in our lives also includes God’s perfect peace in our lives. Anything other than peace means that we still have some work to do.
In order to properly manage our time it helps to develop a list of daily priorities that agree with the priorities that God has established for us in His word. In particular, Ephesians tells us a lot of what we need to know about our relationships with each other, our families, and our jobs, just to name a few.
I created a basic list for us to look at. We won’t try to rank the items on our list in any particular order other than to say that everything in our lives falls under our relationship with God.
Our goal is to simply look at a short list of some God pleasing priorities that we can use as a tool to help bring order into our daily lives. As we begin to manage our time, looking at priorities instead of the number of hours in a day, our priorities will serve to filter out some of our activities. We take control of our schedules by looking at each activity that presents itself in our lives to see if they fit within our list of priorities.
When we begin to create schedules that are in line with Biblical priorities rather than the amount of hours in a day, the result will be the desired order and peace of God in our daily lives.
Guided by Scripture, A basic list of priorities might look like this:
Our relationship with God
Our families
Our jobs
Our ministry to each other
Our ministry to the lost
Rest
Did you notice that this could also be a list of our blessings?
As you read the Bible, you will likely find other items you’ll want to add to your list.
My testimony today is that these things I have written are extremely important in our lives.
In 1979 I stood up in a church and I promised God that I would love DeDe in sickness and in health. In October of 2011 I learned what that really meant. DeDe was diagnosed with a rare form of Leukemia that will kill a person in 4 weeks without treatment.
In two days, our lives forever changed in ways we could not have imagined. In less than 48 hours we lost %40 of our income and Dede moved to Emory Hospital for the next 31 days. She came home for 2 weeks and then left again for 21 more days.
My first reaction was to do what I always do.
I googled the facts...
I embarked on a reading marathon of research papers and clinical trial journals from the USA, China, and France. I didn’t understand a word they said but I read them anyway.
I quickly learned that I as much as I wanted to, I could not fix this.
So we made a decision that no matter what happened; we would accept God’s will. As hard as it is to think about, I know that DeDe belongs to God and someday He will call her home at a time of His choosing. But through God’s grace we also know that her life will never end in death. I love her very much but I know that God does too. I also know that He has something really awesome in store for her someday. I wanted to resent all that had happened to us but I couldn’t. I have come to understand that to truly love someone, you must also be willing to give them up. After this acceptance we were able to focus on the day at hand.
In keeping the promises I made to DeDe, it meant that I had to continue working and do all the other things that I am responsible for as well as take care of her and all the things she normally takes care of. I found myself living on as little as 3 hours sleep each night. When she finally came home, new challenges replaced the ones that disappeared. It became my responsibility to care for her at home and maintain her PIC line for several months. That was some pretty scary stuff. I practiced several times on a dummy and soon realized that I wasn’t much smarter than he was. We both had the same stupid look on our face. I’m sure the instructor was great but all I heard was “Here’s a hose that goes in here and runs from here to your wife’s heart. DON”T MESS UP!”
DeDe, of course, faithfully cheered me on with helpful comments such as “YOU”RE KILLING ME”. Dede is not like one of the computers I work on. If I mess up I can’t just reboot her and start over.
Life showed no mercy just because DeDe was sick. The little unexpected issues that come up in everyday life still happened.
One day I made the mistake of trusting my youngest grand dog, Maynard to stay inside because it was raining. Maynard is big for his age but his brain is more like a BB rolling around in a beach ball. Like his grandfather, Maynard also has a sinful nature. He spent the entire day destroying a 12 pack of toilet paper. I opened the door at 1:30 in the morning and it looked like it had been snowing in the house.
I didn’t see my boys very often but I knew they were still alive by the forensic evidence they left at the crime scene. Finally, in desperation, I opened a Facebook account and posted a description of the washing machine and dishwasher along with some operating instructions on their Facebook pages.
I couldn’t help but wonder what would become of our family and what our lives would look like when all this was said and done. I recall several times when Leukemia first appeared in our lives when I said that it had changed our priorities.
But that was an untrue statement.
In fact, we found that it was our priorities that gave us a compass to use to help us find our way through some very unfamiliar territory.
What Leukemia actually changed was our daily activities.
Ordinarily when I get home from work, we eat dinner, do chores, talk about our day, or watch one of our favorite TV shows. For the most part, whatever we do, we do it together. Suddenly, I was leaving work in a hurry and eating dinner in the car while driving to see DeDe. I would call her and if she felt like eating, I would go wherever I had to go to get whatever she would eat. When I arrived we would have dinner together.
She took full advantage of my desire to go the extra mile for her and usually picked something from a restaurant on the left hand side of an eight lane road in the middle of a construction zone.
When I finally arrived at Emory we talked, relaxed and watched TV like usual. If I didn’t stay the night, I washed clothes and cleaned the house after I got home.
But none of this was a burden for me because our time together is a priority in our lives. It turned out that the location and the logistics of where we were didn’t matter so as long as we were together. I feel like God particularly blessed this time in our marriage. Our marriages and family relationships are also one of God’s priorities.
When Dede contracted a severe blood infection and was admitted to Emory for the 2nd stay, our time together was anything but normal. For nearly a week, I wasn’t sure that if I left Emory that I would ever see DeDe again in this life. She did not speak for several days. Severe Pneumonia set in and it literally took every ounce of her strength to simply breathe. I spent much of our time together praying for her while she rested. I read the Book of Ephesians five days in a row. This is when God began to write this message.
One of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do is to go to work while DeDe was so sick. It was torture. But I had to keep some income flowing in. Our jobs are one of the ways God provides for us so our work is also one of His priorities. God intends for man to work.
In Genesis 2:7, God made man. The next thing he done was put man to work.
Eight Verses later in Genesis 2:15 it says:
The LORD God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and take care of it.
God helped me with this priority by providing people I trust to advocate for DeDe while I worked.
Ministry is another priority in our lives. We all are commissioned by Christ to minister. Did we miss church events? Yes. But throughout this illness God gave both of us numerous opportunities to minister. Even when God placed us in this difficult circumstance there was still an invitation to join Him in the work He was doing around us. There was no change in what God expects us to do in our lives. Once again, our normal activities and the venue changed, but not our priorities.
One night I stopped in little five points. It wasn’t for a tattoo. Do I look like I’d be hanging out in little 5 points? But I needed gas. I met a young man who was living on the streets and he was hungry. I bought us a cup of coffee and a honey bun and I hung around for a little while and we talked about his situation. Maybe my job that night was simply providing a meal for a young man who had lost his way. But I promise you that had DeDe never had Leukemia, I would have never been in little 5 points at 1 o’clock in the morning. I would have never been so burdened to pray for this young man as I have been. I assume that I was part of God’s plan in a work that God has in process in this young man’s life.
I arrived one afternoon to find a group of several nurses in DeDe’s room. The conversation that was taking place went something like this. “I don’t know what you have but other people on this floor need whatever it is. Please spend all the time you can out in the hallways and be seen” and as long as she could, she did.
I met the family of another Cancer patient who didn’t have a Pastor. For the next few weeks I prayed with this family on a regular basis. A few weeks later that he passed away. The love of my life was three doors down fighting for her own life but it was still my job to minister to the needs God placed in my path.
Chemo infusions are administered at night. With the nasty side effects associated with the type of chemo that DeDe required, her room was a pretty busy place at night. DeDe and I had the opportunity to get to know a young man named Isaac who was one of the nurses who cared for her. Isaac revealed that God was calling him to become a medical missionary. His gifts for that became evident one night during Dede’s 2nd hospital stay. After battling the blood infection and severe Pneumonia for several days, her pulse and oxygen fell to critical levels and a succession of 3 separate emergency codes were called over the next 2 hours. The other nurses and the physician assistant on duty were more than willing to step aside and let Isaac take over. During the second code event, I believe Isaac saved DeDe’s life. Isaac’s care always included prayer. Day after Day, I observed Isaac praying in the hall just outside of his patient’s room. The three of us prayed together several times. Before we left Emory, this calling was shaping up to something that looked more like a plan. We both know we were sent to encourage this young man.
Our Ministry gave us purpose in an otherwise confusing period of our lives. A purpose in all this was something that we desperately needed.
In the days following October 1st of 2011, DeDe spent a total of 52 days in a hospital. I was there all 52 days.
Today by the grace of God, DeDe is cancer free at this time, and no matter what the remaining complications and circumstances may be, we’ve learned that God doesn’t change His priorities for our daily lives so neither can we. And we’ve also learned that following God’s priorities was the thing that provided stability and kept the peace of God in our daily lives.
When we made our wedding vows, God was not merely a witness to our marriage. He as been a participant. And God has been there with both of us every step of the way… In sickness and in health….
And we now know that God’s has priorities for our lives that are the same…In sickness and in health.
I am writing today to testify that throughout this trial in our lives we have known the incredible peace of GOD in every step along the way.
And without God, That’s not who I am. Those of you who know me best know that. Have you ever watched an Episode of Monk?
By nature, I’m all but OCD when it comes to scheduling my activities. I like to do things on time. I get rattled when I’m late or things don’t go according to plan. I have methods for everything that work for me. I like order in my life and if every day was exactly like the day before, I’d be OK with that, especially if I could pick the original day. I’d probably pick a day when I was smoking ribs.
I have a system for that too. You can’t rush ribs. If you want good ribs then you have to let them take their time. I have a kindred spirit with ribs. I don’t like to feel rushed either. When I’m rushed I also get tough and dry. So I offset my allergic reaction to spontaneity and tough spare ribs by starting activities on time and scheduling enough time to achieve the desired results.
But unfortunately, I didn’t have a plan for Leukemia.
We didn’t have time for Leukemia. We were working, living life, and going to church and serving. We were doing our best to obey God. We were taking care of my mother in law. Miss Joanne who has Alzheimer Disease. Miss JoAnne lives on her own schedule and she would wonder around the house at all hours of the night. If I got up to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night she would suddenly appear out of nowhere. She was scary…scary as in crypt keeper scary.
And now you are telling me that DeDe is leaving to deal with cancer?
DON’T LEAVE ME WITH THE BABIES!
We didn’t know what or how to do Leukemia and we still don’t… But God DOES. We didn’t know how we were going to pay for it. I quit looking at medical bills and insurance claims when they topped 1.2 million dollars. God says “I WILL HANDLE IT” See Matthew 6…
And then I stood by DeDe and she stood by me. I went to work and she fought cancer. And we continued to worship God and to minister whenever God put a need in our path.
And Everything Else?....This time we had to give it all to God and in turn God put the peace of God in our lives. God made what was impossible for us possible. To God be the glory!
It’s such an awesome thing that DeDe is sitting close by while I write our story. She has a head full of beautiful thick hair.
Let’s take a moment and consider the testimony that I have written while we take one more look at our priority list.
Our relationship with God
Our families
Our jobs
Our ministry to each other
Our ministry to the lost
Rest
I believe that all the changes that have occurred in mine and DeDe’s life circumstances, including Leukemia, are the way that we were deployed to places where God wanted us to be.
Why else would God suddenly call us away from two 12 year ministries at one church and move us to another ministry seven days later? Why would he then bring BOTH ministries we worked at together to plant a brand new church with people who have been brought together from all over the world to join God in his work? Why else would God place both of us in new jobs within a 5 month period that we weren’t looking for? Who saw that coming?
Was God just throwing his weight around when we ended up at Emory Hospital for 52 days? Or was DeDe sent to Emory hospital to touch a life? I would ask you how can DeDe be anywhere and not touch a life?
As scriptures clearly state, we all have the common purpose of glorifying God, where ever the Will of God takes us. The only way we will understand the Will of God in our INDIVIDUAL lives is through not only reading, but by applying Gods word to our lives and circumstances.
When the activities that present themselves in our daily lives are opportunities to glorify God then he will bless them!
When we feel stressed and conflicted then the activities that have presented themselves in our lives are something other than God’s will.
God’s will leads us to something that is good for us.
Conflicted lives and priorities lead to confusion, frustration and heart attacks.
Jeremiah 29:11 says:
For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future
Isn’t that what you would plan for your own children?
So if life gets out of hand, change your plan!
God has a better plan and you have your own copy. If you don’t I will give you one. If God loves us so much that he gave His only son so that we should not perish…then he surely wants us to experience the full life that Jesus came to give us while we are here in this life, completely free of stress, anger, frustration, conflict, and above all, free from the shadow of death.
God priorities are unchanging and once our priorities match them we are no longer limited by the number of hours in a day on what we can accomplish in our lives. Those same priorities bring the peace of God into our lives in any circumstance.
We don’t know what tomorrow brings. James, brother of Jesus, said:
Now listen, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.” Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. Instead, you ought to say, “If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that.”
I'm going to wrap this post up with six ways we can find God’s will and priorities for our daily lives.
1. Invest Time In Reading God’s Word
I chose to use the word invest because it implies that there is a payoff. God’s Word will never contradict God’s will. There is no better way of knowing what’s important to God than by reading His Word.
Joshua 1:8 says
Do not let this Book of the Law depart from your mouth; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful.
2. ASK, BELIEVE and RECEIVE!
James 1:5-8
If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That man should not think he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all he does
Matthew 7: 7 – 11
“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened. “Which of you, if your son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!
3. Chill Out Dude!
Philippians 4:6-7
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Matthew 6:25 and 33
“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.
4. WORSHIP and TRANSFORM
Romans 12:1-2
Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God-- this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is-- his good, pleasing and perfect will.
5. SEEK GODLY COUNCIL
Proverbs 12:15
The way of a fool seems right to him, but a wise man listens to advice.
Proverbs 19:20
Listen to advice and accept instruction, and in the end you will be wise.
Colossians 3:16
Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God.
6. Lick Your Wounds And Keep On Trucking!
Romans 8:28
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.
Many times the things we view as crisis or failures are just course changes on the road to finding God’s will in our lives.
I hope this helps you find it in yours.
